Today, I chose my doula. I wasn’t sure I was going to use one, but many friends recommended it, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized a doula would help fill the absence of my mother in the birthing process. I wanted someone who has been there, but will also be calm and objective for all of us. If you’re unfamiliar with what a doula is, as my husband was, this is a great explanation: http://blog.supplet.com/what-is-a-birth-doula/
Though the concept terrified me, I knew I had to “interview” several doulas before making a decision. With my anxiety, this was not something I looked forward to, but I managed to speak to four perfect strangers on the phone and not make too much of an idiot of myself. It was a tough decision, but in the end, I went with my gut and chose the woman I felt best about personally.
1+ year experience, 10+ births
Mother of 4 children
Has experience with depression and anxiety
Lives in the next town
Was recommended to me by a school friend who has used her
Working on DONA certification
27 years experience, 1,200+ births
Mother of 2 children
Breastfed her children
Is also a midwife
Has two partners in her doula practice
8 years experience, 250+ births
Not a mother
Lives 45+ minutes away
Had started training to be a midwife
Didn’t speak to her as much as I had already made my decision
Works with a midwife practice
Has a contract
It may be obvious from how I described them that I went with doula #1. I wanted her from our first conversation, but wanted to talk to others in case I was just jumping on the first one. Rene really gets me and what I’ve been through, is very down to earth, and it doesn’t hurt that she’s the cheapest. I know she has the least experience, but as an entrepreneur myself, I understand how important those first few clients are. She’s also likely to be more excited, as this is still fairly new, and I’m not one of hundreds of mothers and births. While the third doula hasn’t had any children, I didn’t hold it against her professionally, but I personally want someone motherly for this position. Rene is only 2 years older than me I believe, but she has 4 children and is definitely motherly, while still being cool and modern.
On paper, I should’ve chosen another doula probably, but I know I made the right decision. I spoke with her today and we’re going to meet in person next week. I’m very excited to move forward with this aspect of my birth.
In other news, hubby felt the baby kick for the first time last night! Another milestone! Her kicks are super strong now. It’s very very exciting!